Well, things here are about to get REAL boring. I'm only going to be ranting about what my eyes see and sharing lyrics and shit. Can't get too personal here anymore. For the same reasons I've always been somewhat closed off. For the same reasons I have problems opening up. For the same reasons that I can't be 100% honest with people.
Because when I open my mouth the poison seems more lethal than when I make physical contact with things.
This is what I get for getting close to people. This is what I get for opening up. Well, enough of that shit. Time for distance. Time to sew myself back shut. Time to fade into the background.
And with that said...
----------------------------------------
So that acoustic song me and Anthony are supposed to be writing...I was feeling so shitty yesterday I wrote something nice and depressing. I get sad every time I work on it, which is good. It makes the song that much more emotional. And since I've been working on my voice a lot lately, I can get almost an entire verse in before having a take a breath. Of course, this "singing" stuff is way easier breath-wise than screaming/growling.
I think I'm gonna go out tomorrow. Walk the streets of Downtown like I used to do. Do some people-watching. Write about something. Maybe go catch a local show and have a drink. I'm getting used to doing everything by myself again. I almost prefer it this way, now that I think about it. Don't gotta worry 'bout shit. I can go whenever I like, stay as long as I like, do whatever I like.
I'm feeling rather confrontational though. I think it's about time some internal warring becomes external. Everywhere I go someone seems to have a problem with me for whatever reason, so conflict finding me definitely won't be a problem. The only issue is my shoulder, but I can hang. Didn't hurt that bad a couple weeks ago when applying a beatdown.
[sigh]
[beaming grin]
Goddamn I missed this...
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